Noew I am tella you story wot I was a-treated at jour hotella.
I am a-comma from Roma as tourist to London and stay as a-younga christian man at your hotella. When I comma in my room I see there is no shit in my bed – how can I sleep with no shit in my bed? So I calla down to receptione an tella. „I wanta shit”. They tella me:”Go to toilet”. I say:”No, no Iwanta shit in my bed”. They say:”You better not shit in your bed, you sonna-wa-bitch”. What is sonna-wa-bitch? I go down for breakfast into restorante. I order bacon and egga and two pissis of toast. I getta only one piss of toast. I tella waitress, and point at toast:”I wanta piss on my plate”. She then say to me:”You’d bloody wella not piss on the plate, you sonna-wa-bitch”.
That is second person who do not even know me calla me „sonna-wa-bitch”, and why is your staff replying „Go to toilet”, is that a modern tella? I do not understand, please tella me. Later I go for dinner in your restorante. Spoon and knife is laid out, but no fock. I tella waitress:”I wanta fock”. And she tell me: „Sure, everyone wanta fock”. I tella her:”No, no you don’t understand me, I wanta fock on the table”. She tella me:”So you wanta fock on the table? Get your ass out of here”. How comma this christian hotell tella the guest in such bed manner? So I go to receptione and ask for bill. I no wanta stay in this hotella no more. When I have paid the a-billa the portier say to me: „Thank you, and piss on You”. I say:”Piss on you too, you sonna-wa-bitch, I now go back to Italy”.
Direttore, I never gonna stay in your hotella no more, you sonna-wa-bitch.